the repatriation of onebluegreen

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the long weekend

I reaallly enjoyed my four day weekend. Sure I enjoyed seeing Boston, Chicago and hanging out with CPA (the guy I've been seeing) but more than anything else I enjoyed four mornings of not being scheduled. I've realized I take time off but usually when I am not feeling well or for a planned trip. I apparently need to take time off to be at home without plans.

Boston's brother and sister-in-law were also in so I only saw her a few times. She came by Monday to drop off the sunglasses I'd left in her Mom's car. She met a shirtless CPA who was out looking for an escaped and hunting focused Darwin. He told her to come in the house while he rushed out to catch Darwin. Boston found and then followed me while I walked around my neighbor's house in pursuit of Darwin. I asked Boston about how her visit had gone and she started crying.

The visit had been strained because her mother seemed stressed to have them in the house. Her mother is particular about how things should be and having company stresses her. The brother and sister-in-law thought it had gotten worse and that their mother was also depressed. Boston explained two of their friends, including Dr. Mas0n, died.

Dr. Mas0n died? I was caught off guard. He was in my law school class. He was a radiologist who started law school in the fall after his last kid had graduated law school. He stayed in Lexington during the week and would spend weekends with his wife. Dr. Mas0n practiced at a big firm for a few years and then he did some medical malpractice stuff and then retired. I also ran into at the sidewalk art show because he was a painter. His wife used to come into the knit shop. I didn't know them well but I liked them and it feels weird for a law school classmate to die even if that classmate was probably in his 70s.

Anyway, Boston caught Darwin and then she told me her brother said she needed to talk to their Mom in order to find out if she is depressed. When Boston asked why her, he joked that as the single one she'd be the one to take care of their parents. She told me it wasn't funny. I told her it wasn't funny but it also wasn't a joke. That the same joke had been made about me b/c I was the single sibling and that she needed to clear that up with her siblings ASAP. I also gave her advice about talking to her Mom about her possible depression and/or other issues.

During our serious conversation on the porch CPA brought us lunch which we politely refused. He then offered a mixed drink which we also refused but it made Boston laugh.

Boston thanked me, said she felt bad for blowing in, crying and then blowing out to catch an airplane. As she was saying goodbye she told CPA she wouldn't always come by and cry. He hugged her. I thought it was super sweet. I wondered if Boston didn't mind being hugged by people she just met (something that made my Mom tense with fear). I also hoped he wasn't too sweaty and didn't have BO because I was pretty sure he hadn't showered since we'd awoken.

I feel for Boston because parent issues suck.

Sunday of last weekend CPA and I drove to Lexington to have lunch with Chicago and her new boyfriend, Double Engineer. The new bf is a guy she knew in high school in MS. She'd gone out with once. When he joined FB she was the first person he found. He now lives in VA near the coast. Although they have been dating only a couple of months (they fly back and forth) they are talking about getting married. Double Engineer has primary custody of a 13 year old boy.

I just now realized brunch Sunday was the first time Chicago and I had been on a double date. The three years we roomed in law school we were never in relationships at the same time. Since then she has never brought her bf or fiances (there were two) to visit and I have, pathetically, never visited her. How curious.

It was cool to see Chicago and her bf. I liked him. We ate brunch, drove over to the law school, wandered around the building that is open 24 hours a day/365 days a year (it has changed some but it still feels familiar), we drove out to cabin where we lived our second and third year and then they drove to his home in Y0rkt0wn while CPA and spent a couple of hours in an antique mall.

Brunch was also the first time CPA and I did something with my friends (although we have run into people while we were out). It went well. He enjoyed meeting them but he was puzzled why they would drive over 5 hours to camp less than 24 hours, then meet with me for three or four hours and then drive the four hours home. I tried to explain it was supposed to be a weekend hiking trip with the son which was to include lunch with me but the trip was shortened, the son didn't go, they got started later than they expected and then they needed to drive home earlier than they anticipated. It made sense to me and I thought they were getting along amazingly well considering all of the changes in their plans. CPA commented how Chicago seemed to always reach for Double Engineer's hand and to be more aware of him. CPA didn't think it was mutual.

I've never had a date who was aware enough of the body language of another couple to comment. I'd noticed Chicago & DE held hands on top of our table before and after our meal but I hadn't noticed who initiated; I was busy rubbing CPA's bare knee under our table.

I've started to pay attention to which one of us touches the other first but it seems almost equal. I know I am touchy feely since I seem to be affectionate only with animals and the person I am dating. Since I haven't dated in a while I might be a bit like a dryer sheet. The FPL is a naturally touchy feely person and it has never looked flirty nor felt creepy. Maybe I can emulate.

Saturday night CPA went with me to see Robo Singer play. We arrived near the end of the show so it was easy to find a seat. The crowd was light which almost always means a bad show because they get a lot of their energy from the crowd. CPA and I sat on the same side of the booth so we could see the band. At first he wrapped himself around me and later he tried to tickle me. Both are normal behaviors but not in public. I am not sure if the desire to mark me was conscious or subconscious but after the show as over he encouraged me to talk to my friend/Robo Singer.

Robo always says my name or somehow acknowledges me when he sees me in the crowd but Saturday night he didn't. He also walks over to talk to me (along with his other fans) but he didn't do that either. Eventually I walked over to Robo to say a few words before we left. As I was standing there talking to him I was aware that my body language plainly said I find Robo attractive. I also felt a little girly, I don't remember twisting my hair and unlike the last time I saw him I didn't cup his peck as I waved my hand while talking (that was mortifying!) but I know the flow between us is easy. Not overtly flirty but friendly. Robo's gf walked by on her way to the bathroom and he hugged her which was nice. I am sure being the gf of a lead singer sucks.

So are you on a date? Is that a blind date?

Yes, I'm on a date. He may look blind but he is not. Robo laughed. I like making people laugh. I think he is just tired and maybe had a tad too much to drink. I am driving.

We talked about the recent performance art piece by Doog, Filmmaker, and the resulting arrest of one of my former Sunday school students for watching a blank TV downtown and failing to give ID when asked. We talked about Robo's shoulder surgery (it was yesterday) which is part of the on-going recovery from the injuries he sustained last October when the horse stepped on him and broke his back.

By the time I walked back to CPA he was ordering food from our waitress. I was surprised b/c we'd cleared our bill but he said he wasn't sure how long I would be and he was hungry. He didn't seem outwardly annoyed about my long friendly conversation. For the first time ever Robo's gf waved to me as she left. She looked thrilled and relieved I had brought a date.

Next Wednesday I leave for two and half weeks of training in Baltimore. Saturday I picked up a guidebook from the library; I am looking forward to the trip. I have invited CPA to visit while I am there because I know I'll miss him. He seems interested in visiting and in exploring the city while I am in training. Like the fear of the dland jinx, I have a slight trip/relationship fear.

NC and i started having problems while I was visiting Voice in Alaska. The trip didn't cause the problems but it highlighted something in our relationship we were never able to solve.

When I left for Germany my then bf (strange I don't remember my nickname for him) and I were getting along well. We talked and emailed during the two weeks I was in Berlin but I never saw him after I returned home. He was weirded out by Mom's deterioration and death and clearly someone who can't pull it together enough to attend my Mom's funeral is not worth remaining in a relationship with but it still felt like my trip to Germany accelerated the end of our relationship.

I have had similar changes occur in my friendships while I have been gone. These things have happened often enough that it is disconcerting. I know I am being silly, that those other incidences are coincidences.

9:02 p.m. - 2009-05-27

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